I believe that a key component of healthy development is having mentors and role models in our lives.

I have been blessed to have people in my life who are looking out for my well-being (mentors) and who I could look up to and aspire to be like (role models). As a matter of fact, I wouldn’t have had the courage to start this blog without the support and nudging of one of my mentors.

No man is an island and we need people to help us get to the next level of our own greatness. Some mentors and role models are people we interact with regularly. We may not recognize them as mentors or role models, but they are. They could be a relative such as a parent, spouse, sibling, grandparent, uncle, aunt; a teacher or coach; a friend; a boss or coworker. Think about it. Is there someone in your life right now who gives you good advice, cares about your wellbeing, believes in you, supports you, encourages you, challenges you to be better, tells you the truth even when it’s tough to hear, or gives you unconditional love? Is there someone you look up to, someone who’s strength and integrity is admirable, who perseveres under difficult circumstances, who treats people with respect, who makes good choices when it would be easier to compromise on his or her values? These are the unlikely heroes in our lives, mentors and role models who make us better by being in our lives. Not perfect people - no one is perfect- but caring people who make a difference. I would not be who I am today or where I am today without mentors and role models.

 There may be role models in our lives who we do not know personally, but whose lives and example shine as a beacon for us. There is something about them that draws us and inspires us to reach beyond our current state for something more, something better. It could be someone we know about from history. For me, Jesus is that person. It could also be people who are alive right now, such as a celebrity who lives under the spotlight of the world in the news and social media. Kathie Lee Gifford and Oprah are a couple women who come to mind as people who I don’t know, but whose lives and legacies inspire me. It would be great to meet them one day. (Who knows…impossible things happen every day).

No matter where we are on the age spectrum, having mentors and role models can make a big difference, even change the trajectory of our lives in a positive way. As parents, it’s important for us to provide opportunities for our children to be exposed to mentors and positive role models. It literally takes a village to raise children. For single parents who are carrying the heavy load of being mother and father to their children, mentors and role models can play a very helpful role in their development. As parents we have to remember that we also have our limitations. As much as we want to, we cannot provide everything our children need. Teachers, coaches, scout leaders, youth leaders, and other respected adults help round out the development of our children. My children have been blessed to have mentors and role models in their lives, like Tammie, Youth Pastor at Rock Church. Tammie was a part of their lives for the 14 years we spent in Virginia Beach, and continues to be even though our kids are now adults and live hundreds of miles away. Tammie cares deeply for all the children in her life. Kids have a built-in radar that can decipher between genuine and fake, and Tammie was the real deal. They love her and she loves them. She laughs with them, cries with them, encourages them, challenges them, and all the while helping them to believe that they are lovable and worthy with amazing potential. 

As much as I love my children I could not give them what Tammie gave them, and I believe their relationship with her has helped to shape them into the adults they are today. The same holds true in leadership. As leaders, we cannot give our team members everything they need to develop into the best professionals they can be. We ought to encourage them to connect with mentors and find role models who will round out their education and professional growth. Whether you are a new college grad or the CEO of a Fortune 500 company, I believe we are all better off and more likely to reach our next level of greatness when we allow mentors and role models to influence our continuing development. And, maybe even more importantly, no matter where we are on our journey there is someone out there who can benefit from our experience, support or encouragement. You are someone’s unlikely hero. Find that person, change a life, and in so doing change the world.